Annoying
by 24-7Fanfictioner
Summary: This is something I wrote when I was bored and uninspired. Read at your own risk!


((This is probably going to be a short one-shot, as I am just doing this from shear boredom and because FFN is being weird and won't let me post my next chapter for The Voice. So, lucky for some of you, I guess….))

Sun light streamed through the canopy of leaves above. They broke apart when hitting the leaves, oddly angled and beams being the only ones that successfully survive the journey. Now, maybe it was from the thoughts of a optimist and romantic to think that this must mean that nothing bad could be happening with such scenery.

And they would be completely and utterly wrong.

"Duck!" Colonel Sheppard cries as a small dart flies overhead nearby. The team of geeks and other soldiers trailing behind him do as told, all of them used to this order from the past two hours of it being occasionally shouted.

They had all been traipsing through this almost jungle for what felt like eternity, but it had to be done. There had been Wraith worshipers on this planet, and a few of them had devices to contact the Wraith. Which, they eagerly did once they realized that they were the Atlantians that they had been told to watch out for.

"Are we there yet?" Rodney whines. If it had been anyone else that posed that question, John would have thought that they were trying to be funny despite the direness of the situation. Since it was Rodney, who knew that the Canadian was being completely serious in his whining, as he always was.

"We'll get there when we get there." He says in answer, trying to keep the desperation and fear out of his own voice. It wouldn't do to scare the rest of the team, even if he knew that there was the slimmest chance that they would actually manage to survive. Then again, slim was still pretty good for his normal expectations of absolutely none…

The trees seemed to be starting to thin out more, but John didn't say anything to this effect, knowing not to get others hopes up. It wasn't until they arrived at the end of the clearing with the gate in view that he gathered his now excited team around him.

"I'm going to go and dial the gate. As soon as it's open, all of you sprint to it as fast as you can. This may be our only chance." They nod to him, some of their faces the ashen color of pure fear.

'Good,' John thinks, 'the adrenaline will help in the mad dash.'

Giving another look to his team, he sprints from cover and heads to the dial, pushing in the code as quickly and accurately as possible. The blue matter comes to life, and even before it sinks back into place from the initial reaction, his team is running as if Death himself was chasing them.

As they reached the halfway point, John realized how correct his comparison was when he sees a large squadron of Wraith chasing after them.

"Come on!" He yells, relieved when they boost even more speed as he opens fire on their pursuers. Relief floods him when they last one goes through the wormhole, and he follows soon after, walking backwards as he continues to fire until the last minute.

Still with his back to the room, he watches as the gate closes and shuts down. He knew before turning that all eyes were on him, as he could feel their stares burn into his back. Wishing that he could avoid this part of the post-mission drama, he turns and faces them.

Weir looked at him in a cool way, confident that she would be able to drag him to her office and get the full report on the events. There were the few members of his team that hadn't already left for the infirmary. Oddly enough, everyone of the people there suddenly seemed to almost reel back in shock.

"What?" He asks, trying to figure out what's wrong with him that they would react in such a way.

"John, your hair…." Rodney says, seeming to choke on a laugh as he stares pointedly at his head.

Cautiously, John puts a hand to his head and finds that it was an inch or two longer than the last time that he checked, and was a bright luminous bright purple.

"You have got to be kidding me! Alien STDs, and now this! No, I refuse! This is not real!" He cries. Slowly, as if in slow motion, he falls to his knees in shock, and bursts into flames. Before anyone can reach him, he's nothing more than a pile of ash.

((Evil? Yes. Bored? Yes!))


End file.
